No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
