it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize