She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
