honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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