Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
