i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
