Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
