I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Randomize
