Can Purell be used as lube?
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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