4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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