perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
