I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
