i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
