No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
