Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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