Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
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