I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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