dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Sext me about skeletons
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
