Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Randomize
