dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Randomize
