i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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