Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
