I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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