i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
