Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Randomize
