So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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