these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
