I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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