If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize