So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
where does the pee come out of this thing
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
