I think i ate a live goldfish last night. that i caught with my hand in a kiddie pool. my stomach really hurts.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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