yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
