They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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