I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Randomize
