Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
My pussy is not your playground.
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
You did what with his pubic hair?
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