I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
