they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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