she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
