This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i think i have two assholes
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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