I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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