Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
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