You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
and you fell through a lawn chair
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