come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
