absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
