the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
