It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
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