How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
A bitchslap is in order.
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