Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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