We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
