I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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