Im at strip club and am horny
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Randomize
